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Vic Morrow’s Head

Posted on Tuesday, July 1, 2008 in Verse

At 2:20 a.m. on the morning of July 23, 1987, while filming a scene for “Twilight Zone: The Movie,” veteran character actor Vic Morrow was killed when a helicopter went out of control and crashed, decapitating Morrow in the process. This poem is dedicated to him.

It’s four o’clock as I sit here
Sadly watching reruns of Combat
And I think about old Vic Morrow
And know he’ll nevermore wear a hat.

Not a bowler, a 10-gallon, not even a yarmulke
Be they green or blue or red
For you see our dear friend poor old Vic
No longer has a head.

I’m sure you recall that fateful day
They were filming Twilight Zone
Someone shouted “A helicopter’s gonna crash,
Look out! It’ll cut you to the bone!”

But alas Vic heard the warning
Just a little bit too late
The copter came down and loped off his cranium
And now Vic no longer has a pate!

Oh dear, oh shit, the people yelled
Leaping hither and thither and yon
They looked about for dear Vic’s head
But alas it seemed to be gone

They searched high and low and far and wide
Under every tree and rock
But old Vic’s head was not to be found
It certainly was a shock!

To all of us who loved him
To all of us who cared
Vic Morrow was the baddest of the bad
Never ever was he a square.

Remember how in Blackboard Jungle
He called Glenn Ford “daddy-o?”
He sneered and snarled and acted real tough
Yeah old Vic knew the way to go

In King Creole he bonked Elvis’ dad
On the head with a big fat brick
Now even as a little kid
I thought that was pretty slick!

And when he’d flick his switchblade
You knew he was truly bad
That’s why picturing him without his head
Well it really makes me sad.

After all what’s a tough guy without his cranium?
He’s not so tough then, you’ll have to admit
Why without that mean old puss of his
Vic would be just another stupid twit!

So mourn we must for poor old Vic
A true villain he really was
Not like Stallone or Bronson or Norris
Those jerks just give me the blahs.

Y’see Vic was lean and Vic was mean
It came naturally to him
From the glare in his eye to the sneer on his lip
To the stubble on his chin.

Yeah Vic was macho before it was cool to be macho
He was ugly, nasty and rough
That’s why imagining a headless Vic
Don’t you see it’s really tough?!

Now as for Mr. John Landis
For him I couldn’t care less
All he’s got to deal with is a lawsuit
Heck, he didn’t even stop to clean up the mess!

For losing a head, well it gets pretty bloody
If you want to know the truth
I mean it’s not like Vic suffered a broken bone
Or the removal of his tooth!

See, Vic lost that thing that made him Vic
That impenetrable, inscrutable face
And goodness knows that ain’t no way to die
I mean heck, it’s a real disgrace!

To be a headless villain
Why that’s a plain silly thought
And once you lose a head it’s gone
A new one can’t simply be bought!

I’ll bet he didn’t grumble though
I’ll bet he took it like a man
Even though in his heart of hearts
Vic knew it’d be his last suntan.

Yes, Vic Morrow was a man among men
I’m telling you he was mean
And even when he went through this terrible time
I’ll bet he didn’t make a scene.

Now I know what you are thinking
How could he, after all?
For he’d passed on from this life
But hell, that’s not so bad at all.

When you stop and think about the daily grind
The boredom, the struggle, the strife
You’ll see that dying, it ain’t so bad
I mean, hell, what’s one silly little life?

That’s what Vic would’ve said
I know I’m right
I’ll prove it if I can
Vic wouldn’t have whined about losing his head
He’d have taken it like a man!

So if you want to remember Vic
The man we all loved and knew
Just wipe away that tear in your eye
And I know he’d be proud of you.

Yes dry your eyes and steel your heart
For though Vic may be gone
Inside our hearts and inside our minds
He’ll live on and on and on!

So sing the song, and walk on young man
And think not of the dead
And when you start feeling sorry for yourself
Just think about Vic Morrow’s head.

(c) Stuart Goldman

Bring on the comments

  1. bob stinziano says:

    very funny!

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